*This is the fourth installment in a series of posts on
pro-life apologetics based on the “When They Say, You
Say” talks developed by Olivia Gans
Turner and Mary Spaulding Balch. While reading in order is not strictly
necessary, you may find it helpful. Post 1. Post 2. Post 3.
This third category contains
responses to the social arguments for abortion. Social arguments include
concerns about the ability of poor families to care for children, unwanted
children, and child abuse. Oftentimes people are only repeating what they’ve
heard (and have not thought through the subject well themselves), and it’s best
to assume that they have good intentions. In
order to win hearts to the pro-life movement, you must recognize their
compassion for what it is, even if it’s misplaced or uninformed.
The main premise of social arguments is that
it is in both the parents’ and the child’s best interest to abort. An unplanned
pregnancy will only add to the burden of parents struggling financially.
Parents who don’t want their children will be more inclined to abuse. Children
born into such families will suffer poverty or abuse. And because nobody wants
to increase child abuse or poverty, they look at abortion as a reasonable and
even responsible solution to the problem. Our job, then, is to persuade others
lovingly that while these are good concerns, their conclusion is incorrect and
better solutions exist.
What exactly does the slogan “every child a
wanted child” mean? At first glance, it looks great: everyone wants to be
wanted and loved! But the implications are much more negative. First, this
suggests that value is equated with being wanted, and we know that simply isn’t
true. We set a dangerous precedent when we say that someone only has worth when
she is wanted by someone. With reference to abortion, “every child a wanted
child” quickly becomes “and every unwanted child aborted.” This mentality of
killing anyone who isn’t “wanted” endangers everyone living. As soon as we
assign value based upon an arbitrary standard, anyone who does not meet that
standard is at risk.
More importantly, is any child truly
unwanted? At any given time, thousands of couples are on the adoption waiting
lists, hoping for a child. Even children with disabilities, who are undervalued
by our culture, have families lining up to bring them home. Just this summer,
for example, hundreds of couples volunteered to adopt an
unborn baby
whose parents were considering abortion after discovering he had Down syndrome.
While adoption is a difficult decision requiring great self-sacrifice on the
part of the birthmother, it has a happy ending. By making an adoption plan, a
mother not only gives life to her baby, she gives life to a completely new
family. The same cannot be said about abortion.
It’s also good to note that feelings about
pregnancies change. It’s common for mothers to have mixed feelings when they
learn they’re pregnant, but over time they begin to bond with their unborn
baby, especially when they can feel him moving. Every woman has a different
timeline for when she bonds with her child, and for some mothers, it might not
be until after birth. Regardless of how women feel about their pregnancies,
though, we need to remember that the decision to abort is a serious matter, and
a temporary emotion is not enough to justify the taking of a life. Too often,
expectant mothers who feel trapped into abortion live with regrets for the rest
of their lives.
But what about poverty? First of all,
aborting the newest member of the family will not solve the problem of poverty.
Someone’s financial situation and unplanned pregnancy are two different issues, and a poor mother who has an abortion remains a poor mother, with the additional pain of knowing she killed her child.
We don’t condone the arbitrary killing of poor adults, and neither should we
advocate the killing of their unborn children! Even if parents don’t feel like
they have the financial resources to raise a child, there is help available.
Pregnancy care centers across the country exist to support women as they face
difficult pregnancies, providing free care, classes, and supplies. Besides
material support, the workers at pregnancy centers often form friendships with
the clients, providing much-needed emotional support, as well. Unlike abortion
facilities, pregnancy care centers empower women and their families with
education, resources, and the tools they need to succeed.
Despite all this, many people are concerned
that if parents are “forced” to care for an “unwanted” child, the abuse rate
will escalate. If that is the case, it would make sense for cases of child
abuse to decrease after the Supreme Court ruled abortion on demand legal,
right? Wrong. In 1973, the National Center of Child Abuse and Neglect reported
167,000 cases of child abuse. In 2011, an estimated 681,000 cases of child
abuse were reported. This is in spite of increasing standards of safety, such
as background checks and training for anyone working with minors, as well as approximately 1.2 million abortions per year.
So why does the abuse rate go up with
the abortion rate? One reason might be that women suffering from post-abortion
syndrome are more likely to struggle to bond with or care for subsequent
children. Another reason is that an abortion culture promotes a very negative
view of children. Planned, wanted unborn children are babies; unplanned and
unwanted unborn children are disposable clumps of tissue. When abuse takes
place within the womb, we call it abortion and say it’s a woman’s choice. When
abuse takes place outside of the womb, it’s a crime. Is it any wonder that as
children are no longer seen as gifts within the womb, they aren’t seen as gifts
outside of it, either? When children become commodities, we lose the
understanding of them as persons.
Abortion has become so customary that it doesn't even occur to some people that it is part of the problem, not the solution. As pro-lifers, it is our duty to address these issues with great love. Our culture is broken and needs to be retaught the value of each person, born and unborn.
